Tuesday, May 1, 2012

mid-night thoughts

mid-night as in middle of the night. not midnight.

okay..

- apparently sleep training requires enduring a weeks worth of even less sleep before sleeping improves? seems to be that way over here at least. of course, i can't go to sleep with a baby crying so that's part of the problem.

- in more sleep news, tucker has reached the point of rolling over on his belly to sleep. it seems to be helping him go to sleep quicker but he won't turn his head all the way to the side. seriously. this bugs me. he sleeps half face planted into the bed.  turn your head child! i'm going to move the video monitor into his room tomorrow so i can obsessively check on him whenever i feel the need.

- now that we have been moved in for 2 weeks and things have calmed down i am so loving having a house. it's ridiculous how many little things i would have taken for granted had we not spent 2 years post kids living in apartments. things like being on the ground floor, a drive way, a yard, a neighborhood and the ability to just open the door, grab the stroller from the garage (because we have a place to store them now besides our cars!) and go for a walk.

-some days are so exhausting and draining over here. and by "some days" i mean 6 out of 7 days. tonight during the height of evening crankiness and exhaustion i was wondering to myself if i am the only one that feels so beaten down at the end of the day? are we the only ones who find this stuff hard? as soon as i wake up in the morning it's go-go-go with meeting the needs of 2 little people all.day.long. i start to wonder if the non-frustrating, exhausting days will start to out number the frustrating, exhausting ones at any point in this parenting thing? i love my kids and i don't want to wish their lives away. i'm just tired. i sometimes think other people are more cut out for this parenting gig than i am but i will just keep doing my best.

-my hair is falling out like crazy now. for awhile i thought i may skip the postpartum "shedding" but it seems i won't be.

- i want to start working out again. i also want to start reading, cooking and learning how to sew again. maybe once this sleep training thing is accomplished (please Jesus let it be soon!) i will find extra time in the day for non-essential things.

it is likely that this post is full of nonsense and grammatical errors. sorry.

1 comment:

Leah said...

haha. i identify with pretty much ALL of this. Sam also will NOT turn his head to the side. I keep trying to put him on his tummy so that he will sleep better because it made such a huge difference w/ Henry, and he just cannot seem to relax or figure it out.

keep up the good work! it's supposed to be hard. :)