i do NOT want abbey to grow up this way. last night abbey was being fussy so i was carrying her around the house, pointing things out to her just try to get her attention and entertain her. i came to some pictures of gregg and i that we had taken last april-right after we found out we were expecting abbey. i am about 7-10lbs heavier now than i was in those pictures. when i came to the picture, i pointed to it and said "that's mommy and daddy, you may not
recognize mommy because she was skinny there." i didn't think much about it at the time, but later when i was laying in bed, i thought about how i must be careful to not say things like that to her-not even now at just 6 mths old. it is okay for her to see me working out and eating healthy. it is not okay for her to learn how to be critical of herself, to point out her flaws, dwell on the scale or base the way she feels about herself on whether or not she's eaten a cookie or worked out on a particular day.
i have a feeling it's going to be harder than i realize to teach her to have a healthy attitude about herself when i'm still struggling to have one of my own. maybe we can learn together. maybe this will the opportunity and chance i've needed for the past 21+ years to finally learn to stop being so critical and start appreciating what and who i am.